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The Lone Dweller

words by Edana Isobel Jamora + photography by Michelle Cho

ESSAY/

 

 

'I never found the companion that was so companionable as solitude. We are for the most part more lonely when we go abroad among men than when we stay in our chambers.'

-Henry David Thoreau

Ever since I can remember, as a kid I was obsessed with the idea of living alone. A fantasy I had from playing house and taking it a little too seriously.  It progressively got to be a little strange and concerning for some that I had no qualms with being alone and the mere slightest hint of unnecessary socialisation would feel like ultimately questionable behaviour. 

Now, I am suitably independent and (semi) socially acquired, living alone has proven to be a redefined concept. 

In my short preliminary period of living alone I have noticed several things that provides the summation that living alone has not exactly shaped up to what I had in my fantasies, whilst at the same time has completely exceeded my ideas of single dwelling. 

Such tiny indulgences and luxuries within the space around are endless. On the greener patch of grass, the toilet seat will always remain closed, singular dance parties to Aretha Franklin are most certainly acceptable, emotional breakouts followed by emotional eating without self restraint will not be judged. 

I often create lists that are treats, reminding myself of the endless amount of things that are at my disposal to participate in, creating d.i.y facial masks, going for runs, reading books and poetry, writing fiction, painting pictures and cooking. 

Your home is a strong reflection of who you are. My home is filled with things I love, and the style of aesthetic I appreciate. Books for me are necessary, reading is a part of my existence and a day spent without one in my hands results in a sullen disposition.  But at the same time they are a beautiful piece of furniture. I find that there is really never a time that you feel completely alone when in the company of well stitched words. And the books that you read shows a lot about what type of character you are. Music usually fills the air in my home, or if not without fail The Mindy Project or The Office surely will be present. I like to have fresh flowers in several areas of the home, the bedroom, kitchen, bathroom and dining table they bring an inexplicable lightness and happiness to any room. 

I'm still not immune to when dusk turns to eve as there is something nostalgic and uneasy about that point in the day, when the sun says goodnight and goes to sleep. I still keep all my doors closed and always check the other rooms and behind the shower curtain for a scary surprise. Strange little rhythms that become ritualistic when living alone. However, I do love mornings when the light filters into the room that kiss my pillows hello.
Perhaps someday I'll be open to sharing this space with another (or even a canine friend!) but till then I'm happy frolicking about in little to nothing with a big bowl of cereal in hand.